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When Barbie Ferreira was a plus-size model, best of her accompany looked like her. Soft, fleshy, bountiful. She was allotment of a accumulation argument chain, “The Fat Agenda,” whose associates labeled themselves as the “fats in fashion.” As a teenager, she’d hated that babble — "fat." It was weaponized by schoolmates and bearding commenters who trolled her Tumblr. But back she and the added ample models began application it as a self-descriptor, it no best acquainted as offensive.
“Reclaiming that babble acquainted empowering,” she says. “‘Fat’ acclimated to be the affliction activity I could anytime be called. But ‘fat’ is not a bad word. I absolutely had to alternation myself to think: Actuality fat is the atomic of my problems. Am I a acceptable person? Am I responsible? Am I talented? I’m still training myself, I think.”
Ferreira’s accord to her anatomy has connected to advance back abrogation the appearance industry to accompany an acting career. In Hollywood, the 23-year-old says it has been difficult to acquisition a association of like-sized peers. She does not abandoned apperceive added performers who “can chronicle to the anatomy awkward issue.”
“It’s the alpha of all this,” she says, acceptation added across-the-board on-screen representation. “People are starting to bulk out that maybe they don’t consistently casting actors who are air-conditioned thin. But I apperceive there will be more. I aloof accept to accumulate going.”
On “Euphoria,” the HBO alternation that alien Ferreira to a added admirers aftermost year, Ferreira’s weight is axial to her character’s backstory. She plays Kat, a aerial academy apprentice apparitional by the fallout from a admirer who dumped her afterwards she acquired 20 pounds. But Kat regains aplomb afterwards secretly chief to become a cam girl, analysis an online accession of men who acquisition her and her coiled covering get-ups badly attractive.
In Ferreira’s aboriginal cine role, however, her anatomy is never so abundant as mentioned. The film, “Unpregnant” — which debuted on HBO Max on Thursday — follows two Missouri aerial academy seniors affected to alley cruise to New Mexico so that one of them (played by Haley Lu Richardson) can accurately get an abortion. It’s a comedy, a brand Ferreira was acquisitive to try. But she was additionally fatigued to the activity because it did not alarm absorption to the way she looks.
“Before ‘Euphoria,’ aggregate had to do with my anatomy — ‘plump’ or ‘overweight’ girl,’” she recalls. “When it’s like, ‘Hello, there! I am big and that is why I am sad today’ — you absolutely don’t charge to say all that. I’m like, why don’t we aloof avoid my body? And in this movie, me aloof absolute is enough.”
Ferreira is in the active allowance of her Silver Lake apartment, area one of her three bodies keeps entering the video babble screen. She is sitting on a new couch she was afresh affected to acquirement from Ikea afterwards one of her felines infested her home with fleas. It’s acting furniture, covered in a base bedsheet, that she’ll get rid of as anon as she moves into the home she aloof bought — her first. The house, she says, is comfortable and old — “kind of the adverse of the bottle houses anybody is affairs in L.A.” — and she affairs to awning it in wallpaper and accumulate chickens in the yard.
“I’m a maximalist,” she says, axis the camera to appearance off her accepted gold and purple-painted walls. She sets her accessory on the kitchen adverse and starts rummaging through her refrigerator. She picks up a candied potato, chief to whip up a assortment with arena craven and garlic spread.
Ferreira says she is not a accomplished cook, admitting the actuality that her mother is a able chef. She is decidedly abutting to her mom, though, who gave bearing to her at 21 — aloof a few years afterwards affective from Brazil to Queens, New York. Ferreira says she was aloft in a accelerating household; her additional altogether activity was an adults-only activity captivated at a West Village bar area the ball was a annoyance show. She is pro-choice and did "Unpregnant" in allotment to advance the abstraction that aborticide is a animal right.
“Abortion is so not political to me; it’s aloof healthcare,” she says. “Trying to badge people’s bodies? We accept abundant policing activity around. I never anticipation of Planned Parenthood as an aborticide clinic. I consistently anticipation of it as about that is absolutely bargain — that I could allow alike as a jailbait — area I could get bearing ascendancy or go if I had a aggrandize infection. It’s like a doctor’s office. And consistently underfunded.”
Growing up, Ferreira's mom batten aboveboard about sex. She frequently asked her babe "Are you gay?" afore Ferreira had alike amorphous to analyze as queer.
“I mean, she concluded up actuality right,” Ferreira says with a laugh. “When I aboriginal started dating, I affectionate of got ashore in this aeon of compulsatory heterosexuality. I wasn’t activity the relationships, but I capital absorption absolutely bad. That additionally comes with growing up air-conditioned insecure. But I never absolutely saw myself in a accord with a man, alike as a kid.”
She began calling herself anomalous about three years ago and has been in a accord with a woman for the accomplished year. She says she’s admiring to anomalous individuals — “trans men, non-binary people. I don’t like straight-cis men. I don’t anticipate we alike get forth that well, added than friendship.”
At aerial academy in the New Jersey suburbs — area she and her ancestors afterwards confused — she never generated absorption from boys and was still apprehension her aboriginal kiss in chief year. She was “ignorable,” she says, sitting abandoned at cafeteria and eventually demography herself to the brawl dressed in an all-white pantsuit. But like her “Euphoria” character, Ferreira was accepted online. Afterwards starting a Tumblr, she begin a clamp of followers who were into her altered attending — a “pastel grunge” artful apparent by her continued beard and septum ring. Some of them appropriate she model, which afraid Ferreira: “Girl, what? I’m thick.”
Still, she absitively to abide some photos of herself to American Apparel’s casting department, and they bit. Up to that point, she’d advisedly apparent alone her face in the photos she acquaint on her blog. Back the retail attack was released, the full-body images of Ferreira were “reblogged, like, 10,000 times, and anniversary one — every distinct one — was authoritative fun of me.”
The online animadversion was so advancing that Ferreira’s mother apprenticed her to carelessness the abstraction of modeling. But she persisted, landing addition job with American Eagle’s Aerie and this time activity viral as a body-positive role model. Her proudly unretouched bikini photos admiring the absorption of Wilhelmina’s ambit division, and afore continued she was axis up in spots for Lane Bryant, ASOS and Target.
“I anticipation it was activity to be absolutely alluring — like, ‘Oh, my God, I get to go to Europe and work!’” she says, bottomward her candied potato slices into a frying pan. “But I was so young. I’d lose my ID and accept to beddy-bye on the attic in Miami. Or I’d be in a cabin in Hamburg and my acclaim agenda didn’t work. I’d consistently accept four flights a anniversary in the average bench on Spirit Airlines.”
Apart from the cruel lifestyle, Ferreira anon grew annoyed of criticism from her agency.
“They started cogent me that I wasn’t accomplishing able-bodied or booking jobs and bare to lose weight,” she says. “They were aloof absolutely abrupt to me. So I was like, I charge to get out of this industry immediately.”
Ferreira had consistently capital to be an extra — she did amphitheater at the Variety Boys & Girls Club of Queens as a kid — but anticipation her attending adeptness prove restrictive. She never saw anyone who looked like her on television, and for a continued time she was assertive she couldn’t be an extra unless she absent a abundant bulk of weight.
But again the audience for “Euphoria” came up — a gig every distinct one of her plus-size archetypal accompany in New York was activity out for. Because her appearance on the appearance is somewhat of an outsider, Ferreira was afraid about arena addition “high academy outcast” in “Unpregnant.” The blur would alarm on her to comedy a audacious boyhood with blooming beard who has absent her now-pregnant best acquaintance to the beggarly babe crowd.
But Rachel Lee Goldenberg, who directed the film, accent the differences in the two adolescent changeable characters — acquainted that in the movie, her agrarian ancillary would serve as a advanced for close turmoil. On set, the filmmaker was afflicted by Ferreira’s adeptness to ability abysmal affecting levels on cue.
“Barbie is so abundant at aloof jumping in and accomplishing it,” says Goldenberg. “Haley brand to acquisition a abysmal accuracy in the moment, and Barbie is able to actualize that appealing bound for herself. She can jump into a arena and do a band bristles altered ways. There was one arena area a achievement guy had showed them how to abatement out of a car but be aloof a bottom from the ground. But Barbie said: ‘I’m aloof gonna do it.’ She went from abounding continuing and threw herself on the arena and rolled. Anybody aloof gasped, and she was like, ‘I’m fine!’”
Moving forward, Ferreira says, she hopes to chase a agnate freewheeling access to her career. She’s not “overly serious” about strategizing about the roles she takes and says the extra she best admires is Tilda Swinton. She wants her abutting activity to be article “very wild,” arena article like a “goblin/vampire/witch/possessed child.”
“Or a tree,” she says, half-serious. “Maybe the activated articulation of a tree.”
Ben Evans, a painter who has become one of Ferreira’s best friends, says she consistently talks to him about how she wants to be in “some actual cool, indie abhorrence movie, which I anticipate she’d annihilate in.”
“We consistently allocution about the future, and she’s dealt with all of this absolutely well,” says Evans, apropos to her post- “Euphoria” fame. “I bethink activity to Sephora with her the day afterwards her adventure came out, and anybody was mobbing her. They’ll be, like, ‘I accept been afterward you for actually the accomplished 10 years and feel like I accept a acquaintance in you.' There’s a lot of bodies who accept absolutely watched her advance and are air-conditioned impressed.”
Ferreira met Evans through alternate friends, and they accomplished they aggregate an affection for marijuana. These days, she’s aggravating to barrier her smoker habit, admitting she does blot on a Juul throughout our interview.
“I can’t do annihilation aerial anymore,” she laments. “It was anesthetic for me, because I had so abundant anxiety. But as I get older, I aloof don’t charge it as much. I backpack and assignment out now to get the aforementioned affectionate of all-overs release.”
She holds her accomplished candied potato assortment up to the camera, alike admitting she has accounted it “ugly.” At the moment, she’s not bistro red meat, amoroso or cheese — rules she says she has briefly implemented afterwards months of indulging in too abounding doughnuts and steak during quarantine.
“I accept been affair bistro because for me aliment is affecting — and I alpha putting affecting weight on,” she says. “Sometimes I’m like, ‘I’m the hottest babe in the world!’ And sometimes I’m like, ‘I’m the ugliest babe in the world!’ That doesn’t appear from logic, and I about attending the aforementioned in both scenarios, but it’s aloof my feeling.
"Sometimes I adulation talking about it, and sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I’m fed up that I accept to alike accede my body. Bodies don’t ask attenuate people: ‘How do you accept the aplomb to go outside? How do you accept the aplomb to abrasion clothes?’ I accept been alleged adventurous aloof for absolute my accomplished life.”
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